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Why Your Team Sucks 2026: Baltimore Ravens
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Your Team: The Baltimore Ravens
Your 2025 record: 8-9, with all that implies.
Your coach: Not John Harbaugh. For the first time in 18 years, Not John Harbaugh will lead the Baltimore Ravens to whatever the hell it is they’re going to do. The presence of Not John Harbaugh at the helm marks a fundamental and radical departure from the past, primarily because the Ravens have had only two coaches in their last quarter century. They rather fancy themselves the Pittsburgh Steelers, who are coached by Not Mike Tomlin.
