Ryen Russillo Hawks Troughs Of Sodium In Grim Video

Barstool Sports podcaster Ryen Russillo has an urgent message for you: He will be dead in 72 hours unless $12 million is wired to the following bank acc—sorry, my mistake. I just assumed that’s what he was going to say based on the haunting thumbnail on this video. Now that I’ve played it, I see that Russillo is simply interested in selling you some appallingly lit food.

The video appears to have been shot in a study room at the local library, and Russillo looks like he was told that recording this was the only way to ensure his family will be allowed to stay alive in West Germany. Did he film this thing by himself with an iPhone and a tripod? The abrupt cuts to stuttering first-person footage of troughs of bread and fries would seem to suggest so.