I Can No Longer Accept Being Condescended To By The Little Game On My Phone

I got got by Connections this week. This is a rare occurrence, because I have a big strong brain that can make distinctions that other brains often cannot. So when I lose Connections, I feel great shame. I have disgraced not only my own legacy, but that of my family’s as well. I did not live up to my standard playing Connections, and that will haunt me for a good long time, maybe even into lunch today.

So what the fuck are you, The New York Times games app, to tell me this shit?