You Can Now Be Arrested For Sticking Your Hand In Donald Trump’s Disgusting Reflecting Pool

Things big and small are going bad for Donald Trump. He’s losing bad enough on land and at sea in Iran, but worse at a pool back in D.C.  One might say the growing algae debacle on the National Mall left him up shit’s creek without a paddle, and so he had an Olympic canoer arrested.

Trump painted himself into an American Flag Blue corner with the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool, so somebody has to pay. Now arrests are being made. It’s another sign of how far the republic has fallen that the biggest reaction to throwing folks in jail to distract from presidential fuckups is laughter. But here we are. The Ponzi Scheme of Chaos rolls on. 

To recap: Trump had bogusly declared that an urgent situation existed with the Reflecting Pool—or, as he also called the formerly regal body of water on the National Mall, the  “the Reflecting Pond” and “the Reflecting Lake at the Lincoln Monument”—so he could give no-bid contracts to Republican Party loyalists. Among the folks hired to basically put the pool back in the same shape it was already in was John J. Cafaro, a cartoonish looking man whose résumé, The New York Times reported, shows convictions for bribery and illegal campaign contributions. Cafaro’s pool company is called Greenwater Services, and, sure enough, he’s delivered green water to the National Mall.